I Think There Really Is Crack In It

I just had my very first Pinkberry and I am officially hooked. I stumbled across it at the Los Angeles Farmer's Market while looking for something to eat for lunch. The 12 people waiting in line caught my eye so I decided to give it a try. I ordered the green tea frozen yogurt with strawberries, raspberries and blueberries. No way can this be that good is what I kept thinking. But when I took a bite, I was more like, "Yep, there's gotta be crack in there because that's effing GREAT!" Their website even has a "Groupie Corner" which I found hilarious, albeit necessary.

That's all I had for lunch and had it not been for me meeting my cousin at Wood Ranch I would have eaten dinner there as well. Now since I live 13.26 miles from the nearest location (yup, I looked it up) my tastebuds are so depressed they need to be on Zoloft. Ah well. C'est la vie.

Talent Now Comes In All Forms: Small AND Pretty

Friday I left the kids with John and went out to The Grove in Los Angeles for Wicked Day in the Park. Stars of the theatrical production Wicked were there--namely Laura Woyasz who plays Glinda and Teal Wicks as Elphaba--singing a few songs. There was also opportunities to drink "Wicked-tinis" and "Ozmopolitans" at the bars, Popular and Age-Defying Gravity manicures given at the Amadeus Spa and some trivia games and an opportunity to meet some of the cast. Yours truly had a very self-indulgent day on her own strolling around, window shopping, enjoying the Wicked soundtrack being piped through the entire outdoor mall and getting hit on by no less than three guys! It was a very good day. I added a video at the right. Check it out!



One thing did strike me though. As I watched Teal and Laura belt out "Because I Knew You." Damn they're talented. And skinny. And pretty. Why does this combo always seem to go together? Okay, yes, you do get the occasional Liza Minelli and John Goodman in the lot but usually its the beautiful people who are blessed with the talent. Plus they seem so nice. Suddenly I can't help it. I feel like a toad.
As amphibious as I may be, I still managed to crack a smile and take a photo with John Rubenstein who plays The Wizard in the production. He's from the old school of acting, he was in the 70s show Family that I actually used to watch. So it was very cool to meet him. I also won a tshirt that I may be able to squeeze into in about 40 pounds. That'll be an exciting day. The label mockingly stated it was a Large but I think that's in Talented sizes. The rest of us have to do the math and figure out what the Beefy T equivalent would be and go from there. I do have to mention I met up with my cousin Wendy for dinner and coffees. That was a great time, we hadn't seen each other in years so it was nice to catch up. She says she's my personal stalker. That was cool. Now I know how Clay Aiken feels. Well, minus the crazy fans and the peaking at mediocrity.

So speaking of Small and Pretty. Between dinner and coffee we stopped by the book signing Chelsea Handler was doing at Barnes and Noble. And much to my personal pleasure she had Chuy with her! She calls him her little nugget and now I know why. They were both very sweet and friendly and Chuy even signed my book as well. I hear she takes him wherever she goes. Like a Vuitton purse. Only this little accessory drives a Toyota Corolla.See? Talent does come in small and pretty. Maybe not inside the same body but as long as they're attached at the hip, it counts. That was my Friday.

Woke Up On The Wrong Side of the Crib

Jack my youngest woke up with a Dirty Sanchez this morning. Well, not technically, but within minutes of his waking he literally had poop on his upper lip. Apparently he had a really scary dream or a really relaxing one to be able to drop a deuce first thing in the morning without his morning cup of milk. And I guess since it took me a few minutes to get him out of his crib, curiosity got the best of him and he went right in to inspect the goods.

NO, I didn't grab my camera and start shooting pics for the scrapbook. My immediate reaction was "I gotta get this shit off my kid, NOW!" So sorry scat lovers, no proof-in-the-pudding shots here. Just thought this little "nugget" was too funny to keep to myself. You know I like to share my crap with you all as much as I can. Its nice to know the classics still hold up.

Pay No Attention to the Brown Grass...

Our new playset is finally up. John got it done in a mere two days or so. I can't believe my egghead can be so handy too! Here are a few pics...and yes I know we need to water the grass now. Because right now it looks like the Scarecrow stepped on a landmine:

Sean surveying his new digs.
Feeling and looking cool in 100 degree weather.
Ah...a new place to take the car out for a spin.
If you build it, they will (not) come (back inside.) We do have a shade tent over it right now so we don't all get heat stroke. This whole week its been around 100 degrees outside. Ever see children three and one year old sweat? Real nice. Don't worry though, I'm keeping them hydrated and we are only out there early in the morning...much to the munchkins' chagrin. I can see the next thing I'll have to figure out is how to get two kids who can't swim into the pool at the same time all by myself. But I figure if I can lure two happy boys back inside with the promise of "Playground Lunch!" I can do anything.

Two and a half good movies...A Review

Oy. In the last two weeks we've seen exactly two and a half good movies. How can you see a half movie? Let me explain.

First, I should say this is going to be my feeble attempt at movie reviewing. This is usually my husband John's strongsuit since he's the one with the background in movie making. But I will give it the old two-year community college try.

Sex and the City, or SATC was the first one I watched. I saw it with my good friend Yvonne and we loved it! It was a great date movie if your husband happens to love chick flicks, fashion and pathos. But if he's not gay, like Yvonne's and mine, then you have to go with a girlfriend. I sincerely hope they make a sequel...its been years since the show on HBO ended but now I remember why it was so hard to say goodbye to those four characters.

Second movie was for the whole family, Kung Fu Panda. Honestly, didn't think I'd like it. I never watched the TV show Kung Fu. Never was a fan and it wasn't because the star wasn't Chinese. I never even watched Bruce Lee movies and not because I'm not a fan of bad dubbing. I am! But...I loved this movie! John and I took the boys and they were both riveted to the screen. Jack ate his weight in popcorn and Sean got up to pee about five times but he loved it! Had it not been for the kid spilling his cookies over the trashcan on the way out, it would have been a perfect day.

Onto the half movie. Last Saturday, John's mom was kind enough to spend the day with the boys and let us out of our cage for an entire day. A date day! We went out, had lunch, went bowling, had dinner and tried to see Baby Mama. Emphasis on tried. We got through half of it, then the movie theatre had a power outtage. So we sat like good lemmings in the dark for a while until some pimply-faced usher came in to tell us we could either get our money back or sit in the dark for a while longer in the slim hope the power would come back on. So in the dark we sat. Heck, why not...its date day! After about 20 minutes or so we gave up and were given a few tickets for another time. But as much as the movie we did see I am guessing we're not really missing anything. We had such high hopes for a good, tight movie from Tina Fey and Amy Poehler but we weren't impressed. There were semi-funny scenes but there was a lot of potential for the funny that just wasn't taken, like scenes that didn't go anywhere or had no payoff. Maybe we'll wait for Netflix to carry this one to see the end of it. Or maybe we won't. Maybe someone out there can tell us if Fey finally gets her baby and that'll be enough for me.

What Exactly Is It Keeping Out?

I'm getting mad. I've been slathering myself in SPF 50 made for babies and I'm still getting a tan. Wtf? It says it keeps out UVA and UVB rays...but hello, I'm getting browner every day. I'm starting to look more like Diana Ross than Diane Keaton and its pissing the hell out of me. I am already brown, I don't need to add to the equation. So this is making me wonder exactly what the lotion thinks its keeping out? Its true, I am not burning per se, but I can't imagine all this basting is doing me much good either.

I know this is so petty to whine about but I plan on spending more time in the pool this Summer and if I look like this already the second week of June what the hell am I going to look like at the end of August?

Anyway, what else can I whine about. My CD drive on my laptop took a dump so Dell sent me over a replacement. Then Guru, yes, that's the Indian guy's name, was going to help me install it over the phone but he was unavailable. So John just did it in like 2 minutes flat. I was calling half way around the world to get this dude to help me when I've been sleeping with my own personal guru. He was really quick about it, popped the old one right out, popped the new one right in. Can I say I am totally turned on right now.

Lots to talk about--I saw 2 1/2 movies this week. I'll explain later. Thanks for reading.

How You Like Me Now?

My page went out and got a new hairdo. Hope you like it because I am tired and I am going to bed to sleep on it. If you don't like it I am sure the bobby pins will start to fall out soon.

So Where's My Damn Paycheck?

$117,000 a year. That's how much my mother's love is worth, according to Salary.com, a Waltham, Massachusetts-based firm that studies workplace compensation. Seems a little low to me considering how much we stay-at-home moms do, but there it is. Now I feel less guilty for taking a day off to get mani/pedis and scrapbooking events. SAHMs...what do you think about the amount?

I Have Voted. Have You?

Today's election day. As usual, I've sent my ballot in weeks ago. And again, I voted the same way I do every election: Yes to cutting spending on certain initiatives and No on basically everything that AARP wants. Is it not enough that they get the 10% senior citizen discounts at restaurants and movies and we have to give up our seats to them on the bus? All the old people get all the good stuff.

This election was a small one. I believe there were only two issues on the ballot, but hey, I'm a good American...I vote no matter what. But I am waiting to see some certain things on my ballot. Like I would love to vote that old people (here comes the AARP bashing again!) should be required to take physical drivers tests to remain behind the wheel. I WISH I had the statistics of how many elderly drivers all over the country barrel through farmers' markets each year. Even without the mass vehicular manslaughter, they either drive too slowly (usually right in front of me) or their reaction time isn't what it used to be. I heard that Russell Weller's garage wall was pummeled with dents and holes from where he didn't know how to stop his car when he was parking it!

Another one would be absolutely no playing on the McDonald's playground with 1) your shoes on and 2) when you're over the height limit. Parents thrown in jail for a weekend if their kid does both.

No car soundsystems should be loud enough to blow out my eardrums when I'm simply parked next to you at a red light. And don't pretend you can't hear me...you know who you are!

No more baggy below ass-crack pants on boys. While we're at it, no more muffintop specials on girls either.

No more lazy employees at Kmart. Don't act like its such a bother to help a customer. It wasn't my fault you made a lousy career choice, just like its not your fault I made a lousy shopping choice. Its just cheap stuff. But though its not Nordstrom's, still try to feign a smile. Its cheaper than cheap. Its free.

Just the tip of the iceberg of course. Just hope you voted today. Happy Tuesday!

I think he's trying to kill me...

No, not with the tongs. The food. For the last couple days we've been barbequing in our backyard. This is sort of our kick off to the Summer season. Well, I should say until the temp goes above 95 and we're forced back indoors just so we can avoid heat stroke. And I also should say that John barbeques, not me. Well, I do prepare the food--remove the silks from the corn and wash it, skin the chicken, cut the tiny red potatoes in half and fashion little tin foil packets for them to cook in. But John creates the fire and magic that is to become our dinner.

We're going retro too, breaking out the Smokey Joe and charcoals. We had a gas grill before and it just didn't taste barbequed. Not authentic. We've learned.

But now here's the problem (and you knew there was one coming.) We're trying to be healthy this year! Sure, we skinned the chicken and don't use butter on anything--haven't in months!--but still...it still seems like we're being so bad! And I mean a devious, horns on top of the head, "if I bite into another piece of corn that squirts juice into my husband's eye I will just ignite right here in a pile of brimstone ash."

Anyway, my point--and I probably don't have one this time--is that we are enjoying our backyard more and more these days. We love the weather as it is right now. Even with the freaky tornadoes we had two weeks ago, it hasn't really been all that bad. For now, life is good in the I.E. Who would have known that two kids from the beach and the OC could have such a great time right here in river city?